i walked into room 454, guitar class. i was only 30 minutes late. i thought i was on time, see someone told me that period 5 started at 10:45 and i didn’t care enough to check the day before. my teacher wasn’t happy about the lateness, but he’d have to get used to get used to it since i was either 20 minutes late or absent to his class every day. come on, why would they make my first class a guitar class ?? and then lunch? i ended up getting a 95 in that class.

that kinda set up how i would treat the next 4 years of high school.i was class of 2011 and that seemed like a long time away so i figured id eventually get serious about my classes. i never really did. i always just did enough to get decent grades. decent enough to get into Baruch apparently. junior year was probably the year i put in the most effort because for years people would always tell me that that is the  years colleges look at. so i got myself into the “gifted” classes at mid wood and got above a 90 average for the first time ever. i wish that junior year mentality would have stuck with me, but it didn’t. we all know how hard seniortitis hits you. most work i did senior year was dealing with the college office and applying to colleges.

now I’m here at baruch and just haven’t taken any of our classes seriously. i want to, but when i go home i either nap or watch tv of hours. thats really bad since we actually have to do the readings we get here just to know whats going on in class. i think I’m just going to barely have a c average at this point. hopefully i ll get serious soon, hopefully.

FRO 1000

11/15/11

The Dancing Ganapati is gold figure displayed in the Ruben Museum of Art.  The dazzling multi-colored metal design sought my interest because seeing an elephant god with many arms is kind of weird.  Ganapati, the deity is an All-seeing lord which is compassionate in Buddhist Culture.  The sculpture makes use of several alloys and turquoise inlays, it looks fancy and expensive.  I’m sure this is normal because all gods should be seen as rich since they are respected.  If the people who believed in Buddhism wanted the God to do something good for them, they better appreciate the God the right way, or else.  Ganapati was described as a “powerful wealth-bestowing deity”.  This means he was very popular to devoted Buddhists, because being rich is usually seen as better off than being poor.  Red was the Elephant-headed God’s main color and its twelve arms are ready to serve the people who worshipped it.  I chose Ganapati because this God stood out the most when I was walking around the Ruben Museum of Art.

One work that caught my attention was the Wheel of Dharma and Deer. It was a wheel with two deer on each side. It is said that this piece was displayed at the gates of all Buddhist temples and monasteries, so it became the most well-known icon of Buddhism as an institution. The piece belonged to the Alice S. Kandell Collection.

The entire piece was painted in a gold shade of color; the material was gilt copper alloy. However, it was not the color that attracted my attention the most, it was the wheel. It reminded me of a ferris wheel as well as the “wheel of fortune”—not the game show—the tarot card. Interpretations of the card include, but are not limited to: turning points, opportunities, fate, surprises, life cycles, etc.

Perhaps, it was fate that it caught my attention?

Ganesha’s head symbolizes the Atman or the soul, which is the ultimate supreme reality of human existence, and his human body signifies Maya or the earthly existence of human beings. The elephant head denotes wisdom and its trunk represents Om, the sound symbol of cosmic reality. What intrigued me the most was how Ganesha got his elephant head.

Once goddess Parvati, while bathing, created a boy out of the dirt of her body and assigned him the task of guarding the entrance to her bathroom. When Shiva, her husband returned, he was surprised to find a stranger denying him access, and struck off the boy’s head in rage. Parvati broke down in utter grief and to soothe her, Shiva sent out his squad (gana) to fetch the head of any sleeping being who was facing the north. The company found a sleeping elephant and brought back its severed head, which was then attached to the body of the boy. Shiva restored its life and made him the leader (pati) of his troops. Hence his name ‘Ganapati’. Shiva also bestowed a boon that people would worship him and invoke his name before undertaking any venture. There are multiple versions of how Ganesha got his elephant head which adds to the curiosity.

FRO 1000 LC 15

Are you tired? No problem, just get yourself a cup of coffee. If that doesn’t work, purchase a five hour energy drink. It gives you a great boost and you can stay awake for five hours!  I had five hours of sleep last night. Either college is time-consuming or my time management skills suck.

Why do I have to wake up 6a.m. every Monday to Thursday? It’s because I made a commitment to get to class on time. College is not an easy going hobby. It’s a rigorous four year job. I’m here to get an education and learn about life.  I come to college to have the opportunity to meet new people and have a good time. What’s your reason for being here? Are you looking for new friends?  Are you looking for clubs and activities you can participate in?  In order to fulfill any of these reasons, you have to be pro-active. One of the things that does not make sense to me, is when I see students leaving Baruch College and going straight home.  I understand that people have their own shit to do.  People have homework. People have family. People have religion. I respect that. All I’m saying is; take a break from work. Stop and look around a little bit. You’re in the city. Breathe in that nice fresh air. Enjoy the silence in the streets of Manhattan. Observe the friendly people passing by on the streets. Compared to the noise level at my house, Manhattan is a vision of tranquility. My home is a madhouse until maybe 11pm. My brother wants me to join him in a game of NBA 2K11. My sister wants to borrow some money from me. My mother decides that it’s my day to do dishes. My father wants me to go buy him some food. And all I want to do, is finish my homework and go clubbing in the city. Is that too much to ask for?

The city offers a life of excitement. There is a large amount of places where you can pick up food. There is a large amount of entertainment in the city.  But most importantly, there is a large amount of places where you can pick up girls. Think about that next time you wanna go home early, and don’t hesitate to contact the coolest guy you know, yours truly.

You know what; Two and a Half Men is my favorite sitcom by far.

It’s so witty, and has so many sexy women… I mean, all of the actresses that play the roles of Charlie’s hookers, prostitutes, girlfriends, one night stands, stalkers, and other women he pursues are quite the view. Now that I think about it, there is a pretty apparent audience that the show is aimed at. Not to say that I will follow Charlie’s footsteps in real life; even though he lives a pretty awesome life.

If it was possible, I would just sit at home and watch the show, new episodes that is, forever. It’s almost as if I can’t get bored of it, and I’ve watched most episodes more than once. The funny thing is that last year I would actually sit in front of the TV watching it seemingly forever…rather than doing my homework; and its thought me a lot, maybe more than homework ever could. I doubt that, even though I wish it was true in my subconscious.

The show opened my eyes to many new things. For example I learned the word “perpetual”, which is part of my perpetual dictionary, through Charlie’s description of Jake’s as a perpetual boner.

See, to me the show’s genius lies in its main characters (however, not to disregard the sexy sub characters). But I can’t simply choose a favorite character.

I love Charlie Harper because he was super cool; “was” because he is now dead- made into “tar-tar” by a train.

Allan his brother is adorable in his cheapness and bitterness; also he’s lived in his brother’s house as an unwelcomed guest for six years- a real family connection.

I don’t know what it is exactly that makes me really like this show? It brings me comfort, oddly enough…but I can’t quite put my fingers on the specifics.

“I’m definitely gonna screw SOMETHING up,” I would always say to myself before school started.

Indeed, they say that first impressions last a lifetime. And since I’ve got a spotless track record of messing them up, you might imagine I was a little nervous about the inevitable social interactions that would take place.

As it turned out, the fact that I was in a learning community helped.

A LOT.

Seeing the same ugly mugs every day in nearly every class made making friends easier than screwing up a first impression. Between classes we would happen to meet each other in the game room and play a little Foosball to pass the time. So far I’ve been on two six-block adventures to a Chinese restaurant with the gang where we talked about our old teachers, our current professors and SOME people who just don’t know how to whisper in the library.

And since the guys in the LC don’t mind me tagging along, it seems that the impression that I’ve made on them hasn’t been so bad after all.

I see people hustling.

Volunteering, working, and spending every moment of their free time doing something productive. At times, I’d think, I want to be like that… But is it all worth it in the end? I wonder when his or her life comes to an end, what would it be that he or she will remember?

I see people being content.

Even if the world is about to end tomorrow, they would shrug and go on about what they were doing and they’re okay with that. At times, I think I’d want to be like that—so carefree and happy. But then I would ask myself, then what am I working so hard for right now?

I admit it.

I confess to being indecisive and swaying easily. It took a long time for me to establish some goals in my life and still, I’m unclear about what I want in the long run…

In high school, I just wanted to graduate and get out of there.

Now I want to graduate from college.

Yes, graduate. I’m a freshman and I’m already hoping to reach the finish line. Let’s skip all the majors discussion and what career I’m going to have for the rest of my life for now because that seems to be all that people want to push onto me.

“You should become a dentist. My dentist is crappy and unreliable; I’d love to have a trustworthy dentist.”

“You should become a pediatrician. Then we could take our children to go see you instead.”

No.

Don’t do this to me.

Don’t try to project your shattered dreams onto me.

Don’t try to make my decisions for me.

What happened to, “You’re eighteen now. Make your own decisions”?

Because that line seems to be used only when I’m sincerely asking for your input and you just don’t want to give me any.

Yet, when I finally decide that to hell with asking for your advice, you try to project your thoughts into my reality.

It sickens me to the core.